Bad Mom?

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Is it just me, or is this the age where your baby starts to embarrass you? My baby had me thinking I was a bad mom for a quick minute. It started a few weeks ago. Whenever I would pick Jaylin up from daycare he would cry because he wanted to stay and play with the other kids. This seemed normal to me because I figured he just didn’t want to stop having fun. I didn’t think much of it until one day he cried when I walked through the door, and then ran to his babysitter for comfort ?. The first day I let it slide, but it did bother me a little. The very next day he did the same thing. I walked in expecting a big smile and hug, but all I got was a big smile. When I opened my arms for him to run to me, he ran the other way to the sitter, and cried for her to pick him up. I couldn’t believe the nerve of this little traitor. Lol. This continued to happen for the next few days. I can’t lie, I was mad about it. Not mad at Jaylin, just mad that he seemed to like someone more than me. After talking to my boyfriend about it, I came to the conclusion that I needed to do more fun activities with Jaylin. I know that he knows I’m his mommy, but I think he looks at me as the one who takes care of him and nurtures him, and not someone he can have fun with. I told myself I was changing this dynamic ASAP. I lined up a bunch of fun things for us to do over the next few weekends. We went to parks, kid venues, birthday parties, and more. Everything was good until I took him to a restaurant. He showed out on a new level. He started with banging his spoon on plates and glasses. When I took them away from him he started to pull on the table cloth. When I stopped him he proceeded to scream at the top of his lungs. He wasn’t crying. He was literally just screaming. It’s funny now when I think about it, but at the time I was mortified. I just stared at him like this ?. The whole time I’m thinking: “Am I that mom?” Am I the mom I whisper about who can’t control her kids in public? The thing is that he’s so young you can’t really say much to him. (Although he definitely understands what “no” means). I told him to “stop it” what seemed like 20 times. It clearly didn’t matter to him because every time I told him to stop, he looked at me and laughed, and then continued to yell and bang some more ??‍♀️. Just that fast we went from me being the “serious mom” who can’t have fun, to the mom you can run all over lol smh. I’m still learning how to find a balance. Since he’s still a baby I’ll let him get away with it, but he’s definitely on my list of people I don’t go to restaurants with. That list now includes 2 of my sisters, my dad, my step-mom, and now my one year old son. They brought this on themselves. ??‍♀️

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